Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
now i know why i became what i already was.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
