i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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