There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Randomize
