There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
