Define "chronic" masturbator.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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