I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
