we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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