just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize