Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
you had me at cake vodka
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I made him laugh his dick is mine
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
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