Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize
