so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
