Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Randomize
