I bet he comes in French.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
