Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
