it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
My day in three words: secret purse cake
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
