at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
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