but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
nutella sex= disaster
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
