you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
