; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Randomize
