I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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