After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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