my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
