addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
