I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Randomize
