The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
