I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize