I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize
