Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Randomize