i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
We were destined to go to rehab together
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
