I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
