maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I didn't notice because vodka
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Randomize
