The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
