you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Randomize
