I wish i was in the wii world.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Randomize
