Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
