Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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