I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
My balls are so social today.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
