It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
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