I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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