why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
we should paint friendship bongs
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