They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Randomize
