Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Randomize
