I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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