i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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