people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Who died my cat blue again?
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
