I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
