You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
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