I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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