grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Randomize