There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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