They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
i will never coherently bang her
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Randomize
