i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
