They should really pass out barf bags in church
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
